I do not hate or dislike something as much as I dislike the Comma. The comma is filthy, disgusting, and horrid. It is this little tail that is at the bottom of the hierarchy of letters literally, oh horrid comma why can you not let me be? From the beginning of my memory commas have daunted my surroundings and put a black swelling of clouds around my happy atmosphere of fun. Commas, commas, commas, they seem so necessary, but at times they seem so not. Do I pause? Do I breathe? Do I think? Comma, what do you want? Why have you instilled this hatred upon me and daunting my life to the lowest of low, why do you seek to bring me to your level on the hierarchical scale? Why can't you just let me be one with my letters and stay in your place? Why do you have to direct my life and my speech? Why, why, why? Oh comma, do not rain on my parade of life, work with me and we will both be happier, and maybe you will rise up in life and become an apostrophe one day. Thank you, and no thank you comma,,,,,,,,,,
1 comment:
If it makes you feel any better, I hate contractions. They are a a disgrace to the English language. Are we so lazy that we have to shorten our language with useless and ugly contractions. Even though it is really hard I actively try to not use contractions because they are so gross to me. The only worthy contraction I like and use is ya'll. Just because I feel sorry for it, its like the neglected child hidden in the corner. So I understand your dislike of commas, even though I am a comma-whore.
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